True story.
We are lucky enough to have very cool neighbors. One of them is an ex-Marine and current construction worker. He and his wife are transplanted New Yorkers. They own a couple of parrots (although judging by
his reaction to them, I'd venture they are more hers than his). Now, those parrots talk. It may or may not surprise you to learn that the vocabulary spewed by a couple of parrots who live with an ex-Marine, former New Yorker and current construction worker is very colorful.
Lots of mornings begin with the parrots squawking, and our neighbor shouting, "F**K OFF!" at them. Those two parrots give as good as they get, let me tell you. They volley a massive round of "F**K OFF!!"s right back at him (in stereo, no less). Sometimes our neighbor can't help but engage with them. (Maybe it's a Marine thing?) More "F**K OFF!"s from him. More "F**CK OFF!!"s from them. This can go on for a good ten minutes. (It only feels longer sometimes........)
You would think this would be a really annoying way to start the day, but it's weirdly hilarious, and mostly it just makes me giggle. Also, it helps to put my day, and my own pet ownership issues, in perspective. It's not like I'm being awakened by the sound of gunfire tearing through the walls of my mud hut in the Congo or anything. Plus, our dog and our cat may have their own idiosyncratic and sometimes maddening personality quirks......but at least my pets can't tell me to go screw myself.
Counting your blessings is a really good way to start the day. That's all I'm saying.
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